I'm a woman. And I'm boycotting women-only events.
Every time I bring this up with a man one-on-one, he goes quiet. Not defensive. Not dismissive. Just quiet. Almost like he's trying to figure out if it's safe to say "Yeah, I feel left out."
And honestly, that silence is the part that gets me.
Men have learned there often isn't a safe way to say that. So they say nothing.
And nothing is how you get lonely.
Austin is full of women-only mixers, dinners, meetups, founder groups, wellness circles, business circles, women-everything. Other cities too.
I know of exactly two men-only groups. Both are support groups. And it's good those exist.
But look at what that means.
The only men-only rooms nobody objects to are the ones for men who are already in crisis. We're fine with men gathering when they're hurting. Less fine when they just want to connect.
Per the CDC, men are roughly 4 of every 5 suicide deaths in this country. About 80%. That is not an abstract number to me.
Scott Galloway said it plainly: "No group in America has fallen further, faster than young men."
I was raised by my dad. Most of my friends in high school were guys. The men in my life taught me to see things I'd have missed otherwise.
And I'm definitely not anti-women. I run an in-person club with roughly a 50/50 split each week, men and women.
Walk into almost any other tech or AI event and it's 80 to 90% men. That makes me happy.
I think the fix for left-out is not another locked door. It's a bigger table.
I sat on this for a few months. Partly because it's controversial. Partly because my friends, guys and girls, have heard me go on-and-on about it enough. So here it is.
Here's the thing: exclusion doesn't solve exclusion. When we create more spaces that lock people out, we're not building connection. We're just moving the loneliness around.
The men in your life might be feeling this and staying quiet about it. That silence matters.
If you're a man who has felt this and stayed quiet, please reach out. I actually want to know.
